You Can't Stop the Beat.

This morning I had the privilege of sleeping on a nice comfy bed in an air-conditioned room (Halleluyah) and TELEVISION (for those who don't know, I'm a movie junkie and living without TV or kickasstorrent is diffiCULT). So, I spent the whole morning tuning in to HBO, and came across Hairspray movie, which I obviously forgot what it is about since I watched it LONG LONG TIME AGO. I had a good impression about the movie so I decided to re-watch it again. Surprisingly, I picked up totally different learning points, compared to last time. My mind was immediately flooded with inspiration and determination. I simply couldn't wait to pen down my thoughts about the movie, so here I go.

It has been my wildest dream as a future president to integrate both the natives and the Chinese in my country. Currently we do not have serious segregation problem like apartheid in USA (yet), but the line is drawn pretty clearly. The Chinese will dominate the economy sector, running big businesses, opening up international branches; while the natives mostly dominate the civil service and lower paying jobs. 

To give you a bit of background of Indonesia, I shall elaborate a bit on our social structure. We generally see locals children attending government school, and the adults working as taxi drivers, domestic workers, construction workers, shop assistants, waiters, police, and civil servants. Meanwhile, the Chinese students will attend private schools (considered as better schools because we set our higher standards than the one set up by our MOE). Inevitably, with better funding, the private schools are adorned with cutting-edge facilities, books, and highly-skilled teachers. The ratio of students is tipping towards the Chinese, with perhaps 3 locals in a classroom of 35 students. Although they do blend well in the classroom settings, the condition I observe outside school is largely incomparable to that of my school. There is wide chasm between the 2 races, which remains unbridgeable, until today.

Although the ascension of Ahok as our first Chinese governor bring about promises and much optimism for the Chinese; there isn't so much room for any progress. Many people wanted to bring him down by spreading false rumours about him, making a controversy out of his race just because they do not like the stern approach he's adopting to solve the existing inherent problem in Jakarta.

It's still very difficult to break free from that line of thought -- that they are different from us. And we are different from them. Especially in the eyes of the fanatics.

There is also this stereotype which permeates our society (or at least the people around me), that politics are dirty, and anyone who climbed up the ladder rung by rung with dishonesty, nepotism, and connection. Those with connections can easily pave their way up to rise through the ranks, even without being equipped with the necessary capability to assume the role. As legions of unskilled politicians sit on the top of the hierarchy, more policies passed went unchecked, more ineffective laws -- which only benefit a specific group of people -- are implemented. The whole system is so messed up and Indonesia's ability to break out of poverty and internal problem of corruption grows dangerously thin. This frustrates me a lot.

Anyway, going back to my earlier discussion about the movie (O geez I digressed so much??), I realized that for any successful integration to happen, I need to get the locals to come and support my cause. We need some of them -- especially the more influential ones -- to fight alongside us; just like when Tracy bravely protested together with the Blacks on the street and held accountable for assaulting the chief officer (quite hilarious i swear). My point is, that we need to fight together. Not only those who will receive benefit from the success of any campaign; but also involve the group of people who are initially against us. Slowly lure them and convince them that our cause is the right thing to do. This would significantly reduce the chances of our movement being clamped down or nipped at its bud, because the fanatics could not possibly strip down a movement which their own kind feel strongly about. 

Interestingly, the movie also features John Travolta as Tracy's pessimistic mother. She kept on discouraging Tracy from reaching for her stardom -- not because she disliked the whole idea of pursuing the Arts like most of 21st century parents do -- but because she loved Tracy so much and wanted to shield her from the cruel reality of the entertainment industry which will never accept somebody different like them (Tracy and her mother are obese). It reminds me a lot of my mom, who (more often than not) shot down my ideas, telling me that becoming a pres is nearly impossible, convincing me to leave Indonesia for good, and lead a good life in America, switching to green card. But I was awe-inspired by Tracy's endless determination to go for what she wants. To go for any possible opportunities offered into her plates. To insist on everything she deserves. To take back what people stole from her. And to care about making a difference.

I really encourage everyone here to go and watch  Hairspray! Especially those people who really like musicals like me :P I'm gonna end off with my favourite song from Glee/Hairspray

'Cause you cant stop 
The motion of the ocean 
Or the sun in the sky 
You can wonder if you wanna 
But I never ask why

And if you try to hold me down 
I'm gonna spit in your eye and say 
That you cant stop the beat!

No one is gonna stop me from dreaming big. Yes I am an idealist.

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Too Much La.

Studying abroad promises oceans of possibilities to outgrow yourself; but at the same time, it exposes you to many challenges. It makes you vulnerable as you become the minority in this foreign land. You are different, and you can't help it but to meet people (natives) who will see you as a pest -- a threat to their own kind, as you join their rat race. No matter how hard you tried to blend in, there will always be something that gives away. Sometimes it's your face. Sometimes it's your weird accent. Sometimes, it's your grades which tells people that you are a scholar. The last one is the worst kind of stereotype which I hate most. It is not like we did it in purpose to annoy anyone. It is painful that some people can't just see pass through our grades and label us as scholars. It is fucking frustrating.

During my first 2 years in Singapore, I hated school very much. Teachers often singular us out as scholars, and my local classmates have had their own cliques, making it difficult for us to blend in. I don't really feel belong to IJ, and deep down, I really wanted to make friends with Singaporeans. But my poor English skills often put me down, and I was less inclined to converse with them in the first few months. They talked insanely fast like bullet-train and I barely could catch a word. After months of adaptation, I have improved quite a lot and gained quite a bit of confidence, I had high hopes in JC to really start anew.

JC is the time to re-invent myself, leaving behind the old me and meet new people. I do get along with my classmates now, and I really started to think that these people do not see me as a scholar. During PV session, I shared a bit with them about the pain of living away from your family, and how awful it is to label someone as scholar. Those who knew me quite long enough will know how I changed my accent since I came to VJ. Earlier this year I have promised myself not to adopt Singlish accent, but guess what I am officially adopting it now. I switch accents as I talk to different group of people. But really, adopting local accent gives me much leeway to blend in easily. I am really glad to be a part of my classmates and CCA now. Somehow I feel that the barrier no longer exists and I started to feel accepted here.

But honestly, I have no idea what goes into their mind everytime they see me every morning. Sometimes I wonder. Is it just Meidy or is it Meidy-the-Indonesian-scholar that they see?

Just when I thought I could blend in, somebody prove me wrong.

I seriously have no idea how to react to such offensive remarks I received today. I guess PW makes you feel frustrated and angered; but no one in the right mind would offend their group mate right behind her back. I didn't know if I even wronged him in the first place. The worst you can do is to curse the project, and not your partner. But congrats, I have made up my mind not to even act nice to you anymore. The insincerity of your apology speaks a lot of how you really mean what you said earlier. You can't swallow the words you have mouthed, and simply brushing it off as a 'joke' is really the most coward and shameful thing you can do. Claiming that you can't handle people well (read: socially awkward when it comes to saying sorry) won't solve the problem. You see, apologizing through another person CANNOT translates to sincere apology. If you genuinely want to restore the friendship, then at least some effort need to be done to really mend what you have ruined. You, need to grow up and take ownership of your mistakes.

I decided to not care and make myself feel better by buying a cup of coffee from Starbucks and reflect. I read a very insightful philosophical book, and even jot down some of the exciting plans for my country in my book-for-random-stuff if I ever become a president someday.

You know, one think that I learned from books is that psychologically, angry men wanted to inflict pain on their enemies, and obliterate them. He thinks that being angry will drive me away into a psychological diaspora of submission. He thinks such remarks will make me feel inferior, supposedly change they way I behave in class. Yes, I am reminded of my identity as foreign students but you are not even close in making me feel like I should give up any of my visions. I am an ambitious person and I won't, ever, let you get into my way. I simply need to cross you out from my list of people who mattered, and move on with life.


Lately I am exposed to different types of people, and it's just getting more interesting.




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Innate Talent and How to Measure Happiness. Is it Really Worth to Try?

Has anyone seen Whiplash yet? It went out quite awhile ago, but I just happened to be bored last weekend that I decided to borrow the movie from my roommate. To be honest, the plot was very simple, but I couldn't seem to take my eyes off the screen, wondering what will happen to the main character. The movie kept me sitting on the edge of my seat. Perhaps, because I could relate to the first half of the movie. As the story unfolded, I see myself in Andrew, the main character. And I see what will happen to me -- should I continued pushing myself to the extreme.

It was mainly about a young ambitious boy who aimed to get selected into the most prestigious jazz band in New York, which is like first in the world. And when he did, he was constantly terrorized by this killer conductor, who accepts nothing but perfection. And when he said perfection, he really meant it to the exact tempo and tiny seemingly redundant details. Anyway, to cut the story short, Andrew's passion for music has spiraled into some obsession which push him into the brink of his sanity. What kept my eyes glued to the screen is probably the likelihood of him committing suicide. The pressure to do it perfectly was so unbearable. But seriously, in the end his instructor managed to create a prodigy in Andrew. Although he needed to pay heavy price of nearly losing his mind and even crippled himself along the way.

So my reflection of today is this. If let say, somebody is mentored by such a strict and ruthless teacher; who mentally abuse you, who constantly intimidate you and embarrassed you in front of others -- just for the sake of extracting the best out of you, there is only 2 ways of possible result: either

- you thrive and exceed your own expectation, or
- you give up and forget about pursuing it any further

My question is, is there such thing like prodigy? I personally think that those people with so called innate talent is not born with their talent. It has never been given to them before they were born. It's just that their brain cells were genetically different which endowed them to perform beyond the level of rigor of practice, which ordinary people can only  put up with. 

Having said that, I conclude that we can shape anyone with these special brain cells threshold into anything we want. If we want him to be so good at math, just give him a lot of math practice since he started learning how to read. If we want him to be so good at sports, give him a field and a basketball to play with as soon as a child learns how to run. When you were young, you will pretty much accept whatever your parents tell you to do, because they know better. If they want you to take up violin, you have to do it no matter how much you hate it (this is my personal account); because you know what? You will grow to like something you have been doing over and over again. It took me 8 years before I realized that my hatred towards violin had morphed into love. So I suppose if my mom had insisted on taking me to swimming lessons instead, I would have also just learned to enjoy swimming too.

Sometimes I wonder what actually triggered the metamorphosis of my attitude towards violin. I soon found out that it was the nods of approval and eyes of admiration that I care about. The accolades I received, the first applause I get from the first real audience who really think that I am gifted or some sort. I can tell when people really praised me for the sake of making me feel good about myself , (like you know 'Oh good job, Meidy, that was wonderful') and when people really think that it's really good (like you know 'Wow, Meidy, I didn't know you can play violin so well! Damn, I wish I took up violin when I was young!'). It took me 8 years to finally produce something worth listening to, which boost my confidence every time I go on-stage. Something that I can be proud of about myself. Something to make me love violin more because of a simple reason -- it gives me reason to finally love myself.

I used to envy a friend of mine who was really good at drawing when I was in primary school. I wish I could have chopped off my hand and substitute it with hers, thinking that we can easily switch 'talent'. But now I wouldn't want to trade my musically inclined fingers for anything else in this world

Which is why I think I feel this movie is very relatable. Such feeling of pride, it is essential to keep us feel good about ourselves, to feel happy. Happiness keeps us going.

Which brings me to my next point, if happiness is what we are looking for in this world, why are we so willing to go to the extra mile and put such a mental pressure on ourselves to achieve it? Doesn't happiness takes in different forms?

As much as I wanted my life purpose to appear altruistic (making a difference and be the engender of change for my country), I can't help but to arrive at the same line of thought -- it all boils down to make me feel happy about myself. To feel having achieved something for the good for others. The same goes to being a mother, you feel happy when you get to see her first steps, to listen to her first words. And it's still the same if you aspire to be rich. You think money can buy you happiness. It all add up to one and only one -- happiness.

If happiness is so easily available at different forms, why do we go to such extreme extent to torture yourself? If that is the feeling that you want, why try so hard to get the oxytocin flowing within your blood, if you can always have it through simple things in life? Why?

And sometimes we heard ourselves consoling ourselves for not being able to do very well in a particular field, by making excuses. Example: Oh I didn't get to do so remarkably well in exams but at least I have a social life. At least I have enough sleep. Or the much cheesy overused argument that Nobody is perfect. People still feel no matter how badly they have done in something, they will still be happy anyway. Is it just a self-defense mechanism to protect our ego? Or is it really true that people will be happy anyway?

Perhaps this first 2 axis of happiness can explain it. (I came up with this axis myself, please don't quote me yet for this is still a undeveloped argument)

Essentially, we start with a premise that all types of people have the same maximum oxytocin level.

Person Type A: stress herself (e.g. set high expectation for herself, and put pressure on herself, or known as torturing herself. Example: high achiever, olympiad students, athletes, music prodigy)
Person Type B: live her life as it is. (e.g. she doesn't sweat small stuffs, or try hard to in anything that she does. Example: mother, any full-time workers who go wherever her life takes her, students who enjoy school with no particular goal she sets her mind into, etc.)

We see the first graph A dropped while graph B stays in its X-axis. Person A strained herself intentionally, while Person B didn't. Now watch what will happen to the graph when both gain something in life (for example: Person A is admitted to top university of her dream, while Person B finally bears a child)

Both went up, but notice that the change in level is greater in A, but less in B. This is why although they both feel happy, the sense of accomplishment is entirely different -- it is doubled. So fundamentally speaking, the argument that anyone can be happy about themselves is true, because we all will reach the same oxytocin level. But, what makes people choose to become type A instead of type B is because the delta H is greater. And it all makes sense if you recall the saying that 'happiness is a fleeting feeling'. We like the delta H. Because after you reach the maximum oxytocin level, the graph will slowly go down, returning to its equilibrium position at Y=0. 

Delta H is like an ecstasy. Once you try the immense satisfaction you get when you experience Delta H, you will want more. The analogy is like trying a stronger and more addictive drugs. Imagine that all your life, you were only exposed to Cocaine. You like cocaine so much that you think there's no better drug than cocaine. But, one day somebody approached you and gave you Heroin. The feeling you got was out of this world, it brought you into the 7th heaven; but you were only able to tried it once. You could have more, only under two conditions: you have to leave cocaine behind and help your friend by working for him in the black market. Will you do that? Yes! Of course you will. The decision to leave cocaine behind was not even a coerced one. Somehow you feel that cocaine no longer suit your taste, as you have tried something better, the heroin. 

Yes, bigger delta H is like a stronger drug that you cannot live without once you took that first sip.

But I believe that happiness is still yet an abstract matter, which has more than just 2 axis to measure. Perhaps it has a 5-dimensional shape, incomprehensible to all of us who has a mindset of thinking only to 3D. 

If I were to draw happiness of every single person living in this planet, I would draw it into a sphere, with every single human being be one particle in its horizontal diameter. Each particle has to travel different lengths at different axis-es  to complete the whole sphere from that point.

So to wrap up, Happiness is a very complicated matter, but yet we all try to have as big (and as much) as oscillations to get more delta H when we live. The story of Andrew just prove my point right, and I think you might feel the same too about your life after reading this post. 

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Random Thoughts 2.

Today VJC held its own annual higher education fair called EdVantage for its students in the hall. I am pretty much used to visiting higher ed talks, it's really nothing new to me. But much to my surprise, many people were quite overwhelmed. Not knowing where to go, pushed to go along wherever the crowd seems to flow, being entrusted with thick brochures -- I see my friends' faces go blank. Lost faces everywhere.

Thinking about our future career -- it sounds like a daunting task for many. For the past 16 years, our lives are pretty much dictated by The System. Pre-school, Primary School, Secondary School, JC. Subjects are thrown to you to mug, then slowly but surely you cut them down one by one until you are left with four things you like best. But now, you are free to choose! Free to even stop following the conventional System's way. No one judges you for being a dancer. No one cares if you become a comedian. Seriously no one.

But you think people care, so you don't become one. And you choose to be somebody whom you think the System wants you to be.

Today I went to Changi Airport Group talk to find out more about the different departments inside the operating management. All this while I thought everything is under one body, but apparently their jobs are separated to many different departments. There are Creative Department, AirHub, Commercial... and many more. The more slides they showed us, the more eager I am to work in Changi. For once, I  finally know where I want to go and what I want to do. My passion has always been to work with a team to create a memorable experience for others. Through my experience as a Hostel Comm, I found myself enjoying these things -- being busy and creative. It all pays off when you see the smiling faces of those who enjoy your event. I feel very fulfilled, and I instantly know that I want to do this for the rest of my life.

I have never thought that Changi Airport would be a possible avenue for my hidden passion. I have always travelled back and forth Singapore for probably 30 times before realizing that airport is actually a magical place. It is the place where I feel the most excited (for being able to go back to my home country) but yet it is the place where I feel the saddest (when have to leave my friends for months before I get to see them again, or when I need to send my parents off). It was indeed a very special place, but I have always taken it for granted.

And after awhile, I realized that I only feel such intense emotion in Changi Airport, and not in Soekarno-Hatta Airport. CGK has somewhat turned to a transit place for me. A gate which separates the city I am familiar with and the plane. I enter, I wait, and I fly. With nothing to explore, CGK has failed to create that memorable feeling of extreme sadness or joy to leave Indonesia. And then I wonder how would tourists compare their feelings when they leave Indonesia and Singapore. Is it different? I suppose leaving Singapore becomes really hard when you have a pleasant experience in the airport. It is the last place to leave a mark on your mind, creating this unwillingness to leave, and strong desire to someday come back again. I feel Indonesia is lacking in terms of leaving such indelible impression in the hearts of tourists, although I personally believe we have so much more to offer than what Singapore does. And I think the onus is on me to create this wonderful lasting experience in our airport someday.

As I reached my hostel room, I took some time to read the brochures they gave me, particularly those related to Changi scholars. There is this column about what makes scholar... a scholar. As in, they discuss about various traits of a scholar whom organizations are scouting for. And I found myself fit into those traits. By now I forgot what are the 3 traits they mentioned in the magazine, but one of them was something to do with the never ending desire to make a contribution. When my classmates ask me what I want to be in the future, I seem to have clearer directions of where I want to go to and WHY. It is not an easy process, but definitely something which one can develop over time. It takes time, patience, and clear mind to ask the same question over and over again: why. I keep projecting my future-self and ask myself, will I be happy if I do this? When I was much younger I'd like to be a rich boss. And for that, I was planning to work in oil company. But again, why? If I were to become a boss, will I really be happy? What will prevent me from quitting my job? If I were to meet someone very attractive and the prospect of marrying him is looming nearby, will I become a mother instead? Or should I just be a mother right after I graduate? People say giving birth to a child is the most fulfilling role in life, but is it really? When times get hard, and my grades were not so good, I sometimes feel that starting a family is a viable option. No need to study so hard la, just be a good mother can already. But again I'm not convinced. I sit back and think of what I value most in life.

It was a blessing in disguise that I meet someone during my sec 3 year here. Through this person I see the importance of searching for reasons why you truly live for. To start creating that rough sketch of your own life grand plan, which helps you to make any decision in the future. True, you have no say in determining what shape to draw in the paper called life, but I think we, as magical pencils, have the mouth to sway the mind of the Artist. As long as we persist, and keep on envisioning it, the Artist will let us sketch the shape we want, and He will help us to touch up the ugly lines. If my analogy doesn't make sense to you, ignore it. At least I understand myself after writing my thoughts down. As my friend said before, writing it down doesn't mean that you want the whole world to know. It's okay if they don't understand what you are trying to say, but at the very least, you understand yourself better.

Today marks the day when I get to know myself a liiitle bit better. Thank you me, I love you even more after today.

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The Lady.

I cannot remember the last time I felt deeply moved by a simple movie. Perhaps it was last year when I watched the Imitation Game (post can be viewed below). Today I decided to watch The Lady, a film depicting Aung Saan Suu Kyi's life struggle.

It was my history tutor, Ms Fatma who firstly showed us this movie months back when she was teaching the Decolonization of Burma in one of her lecture before June holidays kicked in. She showed us a 3-minute clip of how her father was assassinated by the Junta military group before they managed to attain independence in 1947. I told myself to download the movie after school, but it is only today that I brought myself to really open the file and watch it.

All my life, I found that it is highly unlikely that I will be able to relate myself to a political figure -- especially when you are taught that politics are dirty and complicated. More over, not a single Indonesian President deserves my respect or admiration so far (with the exception of perhaps Sukarno and Jokowi).

All my life I feel disappointed with the key leaders of my country. Corrupted, selfish. What is there to be proud of? Then this movie came about.

I was so inspired by Aung San's determination and endless love towards her country of birth. My favourite quote was:

I might have lived nearly all my life abroad. I might have married a foreigner. But these facts do not lessened my love and my devotion to my country.

It is simply amazing to see how she kept to her words through out her ups-and-down in Myanmar. Her separation from her ailing husband, her beloved children -- whom always have been their pillar of support -- failed to discourage her from continuing her mission. Perhaps it is the people's love for her that makes her stay. To fight on. To not give up. To dedicate her entire life on a cause.

How can one be so selfless? If I was to have such a loving family, I would see myself distracted from what I dream to become of. Only this morning, my physics HOD shared about his career journey; how he left his job in oil company just to be reunited with his children, and becoming a teacher instead. I guess it's all about choosing the right option. But really, option for whose good? My own good? Or for the good of others?

Anyway, I want to be somebody like Daw Suu for Indonesia. Courageous and charismatic woman. Wonderful and likable in her own way. There hasn't been such figure from Indonesia, but I can learn from my neighbouring country. I told myself to visit Myanmar someday later.

Few hours ago I was engaged in a conversation with my roommate about how she fear for not having to marry anyone in the future. Her friend told her not to worry because she is a wonderful and intelligent person, but she is deeply aware that most don't value girls' intelligence that much. In fact, they fear them. Inferiority, isn't that the worst feeling that a guy can have? Pretty looks, isn't that what all guys are eyeing for?

But I suppose in the end, I can still to choose to have the best of both worlds too. Looking at Daw Suu's love story and perhaps Lee Kwan Yew's, it is still possible to share a life with intelligent special someone who share the same values as I do. They say, behind a great man stands a great woman. I believe great man and woman stand next to each other :)

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Unbowed. Unbent. Unbroken.

I'm starting to lose the kind of flow of writing I acquired before O Levels, so I might as well start getting used to write more to prevent writer's block in 3 weeks time (MID YEARS IS COMING). Aside from that, I learnt that writing your thoughts can be a good stress relief, ... or boredom relief (in this case).

Unbowed. Unbent. Unbroken.

Something that I found really inspiring and captivating from Game of Thrones. Something that I can relate to myself, and something that I aspire to become as I continue living my life.

About 2 months ago, I had a severe quarter-life crisis. Losing my sense of purpose, I became greatly disappointed with myself. Perhaps it's all parts and parcels of adjusting to new stage of life, Junior College. Everything is so fast-paced. Moreover, my fear of rejections put me in a pitfall. Life goes on, people move on, but I am stuck.

I used to be somebody who's driven. Knowing what to do, what the steps are, working my ass off to get what I want. But when you can't envision yourself in the future, that's when my engine stops working.

These days, I invested more time deciding what I want to be in the future. My experience in MUN (Model United Nation) last week, as well as NTU Engineering Day Challenge brought me new and fresh perspectives. It's time to set new goals, new aspiration, and work towards it.

I figured out that I don't want to be a politician, or President for that matter. MUN-ing was not particularly enjoyable to me. I don't see how making and signing resolutions will create a better Indonesia, and I saw a lot of flaw and ineffectiveness of the entire system. So yes, goodbye political science.

In stark contrast, my visit to NTU was truly an unforgettable experience. I had a clearer understanding of many different branches of engineering, and truly delighted to see many possible areas to explore in. I was fascinated.

And so today, I started to set my eyes on possible universities that I would like to go to. Surfing through different websites gave me inspiration, the type of fuel I need these days to be consistent in my studies. Now I know where I am going, and this is a promise that I made to myself: I will get in to MIT.

God works in different ways, and has proven to always granted my desire and wishes if I really need it. I may not be the best from my city, but He blessed me with this A*STAR scholarship. I may not be the best among the other scholars, but He granted me a place in JC of my dream, VJ. And this time, I believed that I will marvel at his work one more time, as He conspires to help me achieving my next goal.

I don't believe in paper chase. For me, getting into MIT is not a matter of prestige to get a high-paying job when I graduate. It's a matter of learning the best from the best, which will be able to equip me in creating a better Indonesia. The journey to secure the grades will be a treacherous climb, but as long as I have faith in myself, and keep on persevering, it has never been an impossible thing.

Unbowed. Unbent. Unbroken.

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Socializing

School kicked in just a week ago and I am already emotionally tired.

Never in my life did I feel that socializing is tiring until yesterday. JC started off with orientation week, organized by the school councilors, whereby we -- the freshies -- were grouped into 6 different OG, namely Valkador (mine), Khizora, Aphrode, Primitus, Revozone, and Xenois. The orientation theme for this year was AEON, which means 'timeless' in some foreign language. Those 6 OGs represent 6 different eras of time, who then must compete against each other to defeat the Dark Lord and retrieve the time capsule in order to revive the dying Time Lord. The winning team shall be declared as the savior of Time, restoring our human time back to normal. The entire orientation concept was extraordinarily novel and creative, kudos to the OGLs and SC Orientation Ad Hocs!

Although we had our big time during orientation, the programmed stretched for way too long. For that entire week, I had to scream at the top of my lungs, stomping madly on the hall's floor, jumping to the beat of our cheers and more. Not to mention the effort I put in to know my sub OG members. In VJC, one had to appear amicable at all times, be hyped wherever you are, and speak out. One cannot simply sit down and be a spectator. We needed to show our pride as a Victorian; otherwise, you will be the outcast. The one whom people don't even bother to speak with or maybe even notice.

At first, I thought this school was the right school for me. As a former Sanurian, there is nothing excites me more than cheering for my friends competing on the dance floor, or caroling together during Christmas. But boy, things have gone way too much for my taste. I have never felt this socially tired before I entered VJC.

Everyday, orientation ends very late. And, to top off everything, we usually had sub-OG dinner together, followed by games and late conversations with friends in my OG. Then, when we get to be posted to our classes, I need to re-introduce myself to different groups of people. More class lunch and dinner after orientation ends. I can be very social, but I desperately need a time for myself after being extremely social. Especially when I got very exhausted at certain days. I would just shut myself down and stop being so bubbly. I had my moods.

Thus I decided to spend my whole Sunday with myself. I was supposed to meet my batchmates from CJCH, but then as much as I wanted to join them, I really locked myself in the study room and read up lecture notes. Initially I had no intention for mugging, however actually learning new things can be a way to spend a quality time with yourself. 

Class officially starts tomorrow. All the best for me. Here's to surviving term 1-2.

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